Finding my true Catholic identity

A journey of faith, love, and divine providence

Sarah and Alan Shapori (Courtesy Photo/Sarah Shapori)

By Sarah Shapori

for the ICR

I have been around the Catholic faith for as long as I can remember. Many of those I have always looked up to are practicing Catholics. I thought I was an initiated Catholic—until February 2024.

I grew up in Spokane, Wash, attending Mass regularly and embracing the traditions of the Church. I graduated from Gonzaga Preparatory School, a Jesuit institution, and have considered myself a Catholic woman throughout my life. I had received Communion, assisted at my godson’s baptism, and proudly identified as Catholic.

Nearly twenty years later, I had built a life that, on the surface, reflected the values instilled in me by my Catholic education. I graduated from a Benedictine University and carried the spirit of service with me. I volunteered with Catholic camps and nonprofits and worked in my community. But in the whirlwind of life, I had drifted from regular Mass attendance, prioritizing career and personal aspirations.

After college, I moved to Los Angeles, where I lived and worked for fifteen years. But when the pandemic brought the city to a standstill, I was forced to reflect on my life. I realized how dependent my happiness had become on a lifestyle that left me feeling alone and isolated.

Almost instinctively—something uncharacteristic for my usual overthinking nature—I packed a bag and returned home to be with my family in Spokane and Coeur d’Alene. What followed was a series of events that illustrated, in divine clarity, the power that exists when His will is done.

Being home brought the peace I had not felt in a long time. I reconnected with loved ones, attended family dinners, spent time with childhood friends, and played countless card games with my grandmothers (both of whom are fiercely competitive). For the first time in years, I felt a deep sense of belonging, and I realized that genuine joy came not from worldly success but from the people God placed in my life.

Then I met Alan. Originally from Montana, he had spent years in Seattle and, like me, had grown weary of city life. Our conversations from the start were different—deep, intentional and rooted in faith. Though Alan wasn’t raised Catholic, he was open to attending Mass, and together, we began attending Saint Thomas the Apostle in Coeur d’Alene. Our shared journey in faith strengthened our relationship and solidified our desire to build a life founded on Christ.

After two years of dating, we became engaged, and everything changed. I knew the man with whom I wanted to spend eternity.

As we prepared for our wedding, we met with Father Mariusz to arrange the ceremony. I knew we could celebrate the sacrament at Saint Thomas Parish because I was Catholic, and neither of us had been married before. Alan, eager to deepen his understanding of the faith, expressed interest in OCIA. I was moved by his sincerity and proud of his desire to explore Catholicism.

But as we gathered the necessary documents for our wedding, I made a shocking discovery: there was no record of my baptism. I was sure it was a clerical error. It had to be. But after a thorough investigation, the truth became clear—I had never been baptized.

I was devastated. Every experience I had with the Church suddenly felt like a lie. I felt lost, like I had been severed from the faith that had shaped my entire life.

In my grief, I turned to Father Mariusz, who comforted me with prayer and reassurance. He reminded me that this was not an obstacle, but an opportunity.

God’s love and His will are greater than we can fathom. The path He had for me did not lead me away from His will, but brought me closer to Him. He introduced me to Rodney and Bessie Geilenfeldt, OCIA directors who had gone through their own faith journey as a couple.

After much prayer and reflection, Alan and I enrolled in OCIA together.

This past year has been filled with the Holy Spirit. Together, we have deepened our faith through daily Scripture readings, prayer, and study. Guided by our makeshift spiritual advisors—Jeff Cavins, Father Mike Schmitz and Bishop Barron—we have strengthened our walk with God.

Though I have longed for the Eucharist, I trust in the path God has placed before us.

On April 19, 2025, Alan and I will be baptized together. On May 24, 2025, we will receive the Sacrament of Matrimony at Saint Thomas the Apostle.

I now see this was always God’s plan. He led me home, to Alan, and ultimately to the truth of my faith. Through it all, He has been present, guiding us toward a deeper relationship with Him. And as we step into this new chapter, we do so with hearts full of gratitude, knowing that our love and faith are forever intertwined.

Alan and Sarah Shapori rejoice with Bishop Peter after the Rite of Election at St. Thomas the Apostle in Coeur d’Alene. (Courtesy Photo/Sarah Shapori)