‘Old age is not a disease... it is strength and survivorship’

Katie Pape shares the experience of caring for her daughter

St. Mark’s parishioner Katie Pape, standing, continues to care for her challenged daughter, Leah, who was seriously injured in a car crash when she was 16-years-old.

(Courtesy Photo/Mary Hersley-Kaineg)

On July 11, 1990, Katie and Tom Pape’s youngest daughter, 16 year-old Leah, was involved in a near-fatal car accident. She survived the crash but sustained a traumatic brain injury that left her profoundly disabled. Katie recalls the event as if it happened yesterday. “At 4:30 in the afternoon, we received a phone call from St. Alphonsus Hospital, asking us to identify our daughter,” Katie related. “I remember thinking, ‘They said daughter…they didn’t say body, so she is alive.’”

Once the family arrived at the hospital, details began to emerge. Leah had received her driver’s license the day before So, like many teens, she was anxious to take a drive. “That’s when she made a poor choice,” said her mom. “She picked up a friend and, without our knowing it, decided to take a little trip to the mountains. On a hairpin curve, Leah drove directly into an on-coming pickup truck. There was nothing either driver could do,” said Katie.

“The only good news was that Katie’s friend was not seriously injured, and the driver of the pickup sustained no injuries,” Katie explained. The driver of the truck later stated that as the vehicles collided, he was looking directly into the eyes of the teenage driver. He reported that he would never forget the look he saw on her face as their cars met head-on.

Following the accident, Leah lived in a body cast for six weeks before being medically released from the hospital. In mid-August, she was transferred to the Idaho Elk’s Rehabilitation Hospital, where she received intensive rehab care. After 4 months, Leah was released as an out-patient.

Leah left rehab with profound disabilities that rendered her confined to a wheelchair and only marginally verbal.

‘Strength and survivorship’

As others with similar stories can tell you, living and caring for someone with a traumatic brain injury is a 24-hour care project. Maggie Kuhn (1905-1995), the self-proclaimed “wrinkled radical” who became an advocate for the aging and those with disabilities, once said, “Old age is not a disease...it is strength and survivorship.” Strength and survivorship would perfectly describe Katie Pape.

“We decided our only choice was to take her home and care for her here. We never planned for a ‘worst case scenario’ to be part of our retirement,” Katie said, “but we never once regretted our decision.”

Through the years, Leah has received many hours of therapy. As she began to heal, some of her rehab team noticed that Leah had a creative side.

Seizing on this unexpected talent, her team began to encourage Leah to explore crocheting, ceramics and painting in watercolors. “She has created some lovely pictures,” her proud mom beamed.

Despite her physical challenges, Leah found employment at Zurchers, a party, costume and wedding store for whom she prepares party ribbons. This makes her feel useful and needed, her mom explained.

“They were very kind, early on, to give her a small job,” Katie said. “It keeps her busy and focused, and she has a small savings account, which gives her a feeling of independence.”

Despite her challenges, Leah Pape is a talented artist. She is shown above with one of her watercolor prints.(Courtesy Photo/Mary Hersley-Kaineg)

Growing up

Katie, a longtime member of St. Mark Parish, was born in 1944 in Caldwell, Idaho, where she was the oldest of eight children. At that time, her father, serving in the military, was stationed in the Philippines.

“When I was three years old, my father was discharged from the service, and we moved to Boise to be closer to my dad’s place of employment,” she said. “From very early childhood, I was given piano lessons, and because my mother was a well-trained and gifted vocalist, I also became well-versed in Catholic sacred music.”

Her mother sang in the choir at St. John’s Cathedral and was one of the main soloists for weddings and funerals. “Very often, the Cathedral choir rehearsed in our home. Our living room became a mini choir and music studio. I grew up hearing all the music from the Christmas and Easter liturgies. I was immersed in sacred susic and Catholic liturgy,” Katie said. “I have loved it all of my life.”

As one might expect, she later followed her mother’s professional path and spent many years of her life playing for weddings and funerals in churches throughout the Boise area.

Along with the skills Katie learned from her mother, she was privileged to attend Boise’s St. Theresa Academy (which evolved into Bishop Kelly) from first grade through high school graduation. Once out of high school, Katie began college at Boise Jr. College. A year later, in 1962, Katie married Tom Pape at Sacred Heart Church, Boise.

As their family grew, Katie began to teach piano lessons and, like her mother, created a studio in her own living room.

Along with teaching, Katie discovered a talent for writing. Before long, she had articles published in the Idaho Catholic Register and even put together a handbook for ICR correspondents.

The 1968 “Handbook for Idaho Register Correspondents” was a guide to the selection and preparation of news stories, outlining the policies and practices of the Diocese. She also wrote for the Idaho Statesman, covering stories for the Women’s Section of the Society Page.

After the Pape family welcomed their fourth child, they were able to realize a long-time dream and settled on a 12-acre patch of land just outside Boise in Kuna, Idaho. The dream became complete when they were able to add some horses to the farming venture.

In time, Katie became involved with the music program at St.Mark’s school, which included teaching classroom music and helping with band practice. In 1980, Katie accepted the position of parish Director of Music at St. Mark’s Church. The Pape children were growing up, and it seemed a good time to take on such a time-consuming job. Once again, Katie became immersed in sacred music, only now she was no longer a spectator, but instead the director of the liturgical music at her parish church.

On February 15, 2008, only a few weeks after his diagnosis, Tom died of cancer. Steadfast in the decision she and Tom made thirty-five years ago, Katie lovingly cares for Leah. She also continues “teaching little fingers to play” and currently has 10 students who come to her home studio.

When COVID-19 arrived in Idaho, Katie retired from her many years with the St. Mark’s Church music program. To this day, she continues to take Leah to Mass every weekend. “I know she doesn’t have to go,” said Katie, “but she loves to attend Mass, and she has a small ‘fan club’ that asks about her if she misses a Sunday.”

Facing the Future

Now, at the age of 81, Katie Pape faces questions about the future: Leah’s and her own.

“I may have to get some ‘in-home’ care assistance eventually,” she said. At this time, placing Leah in a care facility is something she is not ready to face.

With tears in her eyes, Katie said, “I just can’t bear the thought of some stranger taking care of her personal needs.” Leah added, “I just love living with my Mommie.”

For as long as she is able, this 80-plus senior plans to continue her unexpected retirement plan, one that certainly echoes the words of Maggie Kuhn—an aging life of “strength and survivorship.”